S.I.N.

"There is no sin except stupidity." - Oscar Wilde

I've just returned from taking Jacob to do the last formal piece of transitioning from kid to adult before he leaves for school next week. We went to a Service Canada office so Jacob could obtain a social insurance number. On Monday I took him to the bank and transferred his Youth Account into a Student Account. There is no bunny picture on his passbook this time. He also applied for a credit card. We were advised on Tuesday that his card was approved.

I don't know which of us is feeling more shell-shocked. Jacob tells me the responsibilities of adulthood weigh heavily on his mind. He doesn't want to make any mistakes. Somehow he thinks there is no allowance anymore for youthful indiscretions. He is a man now, fully accountable for his actions. I don't want to discourage his sense of accountability or responsibility, but I don't want him to be so hard on himself either. Over lunch today I told him he will make many mistakes - not just as an eighteen-year-old but as a fifty-four-year-old too. The secret is to own up to your mistakes, make amends where you can, learn from the experience, forgive yourself and move on. I suspect he's going to struggle with the "forgive yourself" part the most. He's entering a really exciting phase in his life. I remember the excitement that accompanied the transition from high school to university and moving away from home, though those two events didn't occur simultaneously for me. But I also remember the anxiety, the fear and the angst. I know he'll be okay. In his heart-of-hearts he knows that too. Transition is hard and not as abrupt as it might seem. He may have made the legal transition from boy to man last week when he turned eighteen, but there is still a boy dwelling somewhere in his man body.