The last day of 2020 is finally here. What a year! There will be few people who won't be happy to see the back end of this one. Not that it was all bad, at least for me. It started strong - twenty-five incredible days exploring the other side of the world, the trip of a lifetime. But by the time we got home in mid-March, the world was already coming unglued. We went directly from the airport into coronavirus lockdown and though we thought it wouldn't last so long, we are are still there.
We suffered the disappointment of no Easter celebrations. The Australian-themed dinner I had planned for our annual Good Friday gathering got re-imagined as an Australian-themed Christmas Eve. It seems naive in retrospect. There was no Mother's Day visit from my son though by the time Father's Day arrived, the warm weather had arrived in time for a Father's Day golf game and dinner on the deck. The summer days were easier. I turned sixty-five in July. My sister hosted an outdoor gathering. There were afternoons spent around the neighbour's pool and visits on the deck from friends we had been unable to see. A much anticipated wedding of some dear young friends went ahead in a significantly altered form. I wasn't able to be there but I still got to help with some of the details and there were wonderful pictures to enjoy. Less than two months later, we lost our dear friend, father of the groom. The normal rituals of mourning went out the window in favor of a socially-distanced, restricted gathering that provided little comfort or solace. I thought my heart would never mend but I did the best I could to support his family and kept my tears to myself to be sobbed out over morning coffee and soaks in the tub.
But there was hope amidst the weariness of continuing restrictions.The numbers were flattening. The vaccine was coming. Restrictions would be lifted. Maybe we just got too complacent or maybe it was just an inevitable part of the cycle, but the numbers worsened, restrictions tightened and my Australian-themed Christmas plans went to hell.
Christmas Eve dinner became a scaled-down event broken into individual portions. Trifles and charcuterie plates delivered to different houses along with green tomato relish, jars of goodies from my canning shelves and bags of Hershey's Hugs and Kisses as a substitute for the table gifts I ordered on Black Friday that still haven't arrived. There was a Christmas Eve toast on Zoom, not the usual festivities but the best we could do in lockdown. Jacob came home for a week so rather than sit around our usually noisy Christmas Eve table, we ate downstairs, chatted and watched It's A Wonderful Life. Different but still sweet. We have never had a Christmas Eve where it was just the three of us. Gifts of experiences normally given to share in the coming year were exchanged for small thoughtful offerings, painstakingly considered by their givers - excellent and meaningful books, local honey and hand-painted chocolates, a photo compilation from our trip. Best of all, a Christmas note of love from my son that is destined to be my finest treasure from the year.
And now we have reached the end of the year. Jacob has gone home. The house feels quiet and cavernous. We are locked down tighter than a drum, back to days of no socializing, no bubbles, no hugs or coffee afternoons. It feels bleak. We have decided to leave the Christmas decorations up longer. We'll leave the lights in the trees and on the deck, the bannister boughed and lit, and the angels watching over us that fill the foyer and living room. Let there be light in these dark days. Chances that we will be vaccinated before the end of summer are looking like they are slim to none but there is at least a vaccine. We know there is light at the end of the tunnel. Our challenge is to create the light in the darkness along the way until we can finally step into the sun again.
Happy New Year Everyone! May 2021 treat us kindly.
