A Mommy/Jacob Holiday

"Grown don't mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child. They get bigger, older, but grown. In my heart it don't mean a thing." - Toni Morrison

When Jacob was very small and I was a frazzled woman trying to balance the responsibilities of an executive position at the bank and the weighty responsibilities of motherhood, I would plan Mommy/Jacob holidays. I usually didn't tell Jacob until the night before that the next day would be one of our special days. I would take the day off from work, pull Jacob out of daycare and we would spend the day together doing anything he wanted - an afternoon at Chuckie Cheese's, a movie and lunch at McDonald's, a day of climbing and playing at a climbing center or just a day of cuddles and crafts at home. It didn't matter what we did so long as we did it together. Mommy/Jacob holidays were our special time. Just we two, no outsiders allowed.

We continued our holidays even when Jacob was in elementary school though I usually structured them around PD days when he was not in school. The rules were always the same. We did whatever he wanted to do. We stopped calling them Mommy/Jacob holidays once he was more grown but we continued to have days when just the two of us went off to do something fun, be it a day at Dave and Buster's or a walk through Chinatown. We would talk and laugh and get caught up the way friends do.

Last Sunday, feeling the desperate need for a little alone time with him, I texted and asked if he could fit me in one day this week for lunch or coffee. He quickly responded that today would be great. He had a three hour window between classes when we could get together. I drove out to Guelph, picked him up from the dorm and reiterated the rules - we had three hours to do whatever he wanted.

We started with lunch at Moxie's where I encouraged Jacob to eat whatever his heart desired. He certainly is looking better than when I last saw him, but he is wafer thin. What he really wanted, he confessed, was a steak but he was aghast at the price and thought he would settle for a burger instead. One twelve ounce peppercorn sirloin later, we headed out of Moxie's for our next stop at EB Games. Apparently a new version of Call of Duty is out and he desperately wanted it. I beat him to the Interac machine and paid for the game. Then we were off to the bank and then to Future Shop. A few days ago Jacob lost the charger for his laptop and he has been beating himself up about it ever since. I personally don't see the margin in self-flagellation and finally convinced him to let himself off the hook. I bought a new charger. Next stop was the beer store for a couple of twelve-packs of Canadian tallboys. All finished with his list we headed back to the dorm.

I helped Jacob unload the car and carry the stuff to his dorm. I said goodbye in his dorm room but he decided to walk me back to the car. I thanked him for letting me spend time with him. He told me to come back whenever I wanted but suggested maybe next time we could have dinner. Apparently the window of time for our Mommy/Jacob holiday was a little short for him too.