Grief

 "I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge.  That myth is more potent than history.  That dreams are more powerful than facts.  That hope always triumphs over experience.  That laughter is the only cure for grief.  And I believe that love is stronger than death." - Robert Fulghum

Perhaps it is the time of year that makes things feel worse.  Grief in a season of joy seems magnified.  On Monday, Gail's dad passed away after a long battle with heart disease.  He was ninety-four.  She is devastated.  Even when we know the loss of a loved one is coming, there is no way to steel oneself against the pain when it occurs.

On Tuesday, we learned that Jon's uncle, Josee's brother, had also passed away.  Apparently he dropped his children off at school, returned home, laid on the couch and died.  No illness.  No warning.  He was fifty-three.  Devastation doesn't even begin to describe the grief of his family.

I was already feeling blue before the news of these deaths.  The state of the world seems bleak.  I've tried turning off the news and stopped giving the front page of the newspaper more than a perfunctory glance.  Nonetheless, I can't seem to escape from it.  The mass shooting in California last night hit me hard. I heard about it sitting in the dining room at my mom's nursing home.  I don't understand anything anymore.

Normally I would turn to prayer in these times of darkness.  But as the New York Daily News wrote in their headline this morning - God isn't fixing this.   I'm struggling to find hope and laughter.